Who Do You Think You Are?

She stood a bit taller than my 5' 5½" stature.  Her long brown hair fell lazily over her shoulders with no thought given to it.

What captivated me about this woman was her unique look; chic without trying.  She wasn't wearing make-up, just black eyeliner and mascara.  A gypsy patterned, flouncy skirt rode low on her slender hips, the hem just hitting the tops of her distressed brown leather boots.  She wore a white T-shirt under a man's forest green cardigan haphazardly held together with a clunky belt that resembled the cinch from an old saddle.  Her only jewelry was a mismatch of rings on most fingers and large gold hoops through her earlobes.  She looked to be about twenty-four.

We waded through security side by side,  being herded through the preboarding chaos, and we ended up sitting near each other on the plane to Atlanta.  "Hello again."  We said before getting settled.

I took out my magazine, ready for some mindless reading when she asked me, "Are you traveling to Atlanta or do you live there?"

"I live in the North Bay area, the wine country."  Smiled and continued to read.

"Are you traveling on business?"  She wasn't getting the hint.

I gave her the scoop on how I'd been a fitness professional for a long time and how lately I'd been dabbling in my art again.  "I love what I do, but lately I've been wanting something more.  Strangely, I fell into this gig working with a group of creative people doing the John Lennon art show.  I'd always been the artistic one in the family, but with the family business being concrete construction, my talents were appreciated at best when shown at family gatherings and the county fair.  My dad used to say, 'who do you think you are, Michelangelo?"

She told me how she'd wanted to become an artist, but her family never really encouraged her.  "My parents thought I'd make a great flight attendant.  They really don't know me, I guess.  So I went to the Fashion Institute and now I am working as an assistant buyer.  I thought my job would be more creative, but I'm really a glorified secretary and I am not so good at office management."  Her story was all too familiar.

Can you see my fairy god-sister?  She shows up at the strangest places.

As we left the plane, I prepared to say good-bye to my friend, but she was no where to be seen.  I hopped a cab to the Westin in Buckhead and during the half hour ride I fell asleep.  When I woke, I remembered a dream.

I dreamt of a time when I was young and wanted to be an artist, but it wasn't considered an important endeavor to pursue art, therefore my idea wasn't a good one.  I looked out the cab window seeing Atlanta up close.   I saw my reflection and there was my airplane friend staring back at me.  Her uncertainty and earnestness written across her face.   And right then and there, I knew I could be whoever I want.  All I need is a burning desire and the focus that comes with it.

In Atlanta with John Lennon

He was a complex man.  Being around his art and music this weekend was an inspirational blast that exploded my narrow imagination.  I truly believed I had an expansive, elevated and deep capacity for imagination, but, day by day my mind opened and my narrowness was exposed to me.  I, now, believe I will never be able to sit in total comfort of being.  I will need constant and challenging exploration of my mind through the examination of an other's.

Skinny Mashed Potatoes and De-Fatted Gravy. Huhhh?

I remember the first time I hosted Thanksgiving dinner after I had become a full fledged fitness trainer.  My dad had passed away six months before and I was now living in his home; the home we all went to for Thanksgiving.  It only seemed appropriate for me to carry on the tradition and have the gang still come to Papa's.

Now, as a "trainer", it seemed fitting for me to plan my feast with care and avoid fats and sugars.  I roasted a large turkey.   My "skinny mashed potatoes" (made with chicken stock and not butter and cream) were more the consistency of vichyssoise.  The gravy was de-fatted and defeated into a watery soup.  The sweet potatoes where simply baked.  (Ugh.)  And I experimented with the stuffing and chose a sophisticated Shiitake mushroom number I found in an obscure cookbook.  Little did I know, my family was horrified and left feeling our love but a bit deprived.  They missed our family's traditional recipes and a full belly.

When I'd offered to host Thanksgiving again, my family found clever excuses to politely decline until I'd finally confronted them with "what's up, guys?  Let's have it".

The truth hurt at first; they hated my "healthy" version of a traditional Thanksgiving dinner and even though they were a bit overweight, felt Thanksgiving was just one of those feasts that should be enjoyed in it's purity of tradition and flavor.  They, of course, were right and now I would never consider shirking on those old family recipes.

So, my sons are home from college and Randy is out buying a turkey for us to deep fry ( don't freak out, done properly, the bird doesn't absorb the oil and it is delicious, tender and juicy).  My older sister will host our festivities and we will all bring our favorite Thanksgiving dish.  We will sit as a family  (with my sis's first little grand-baby girl!) and give thanks for our love, health and homes.

Happy Thanksgiving and enjoy your traditions.

Here we go...3 Days to Fit and Fabulous!

How can it possibly be that the average weight gain through the holidays is approximately seven to ten pounds?

Fromage my fave!

It isn’t simply because of the extra parties we attend from November 19 through January 2.  Yes, this is six plus weeks of eggnog and pecan pie, baked Brie and pigs in a blanket, buttered mashed potatoes and giblet gravy, pumpkin pie and champagne, fondue and warm bread.  But, it isn’t those extra calories alone that make the “diet industry” welcome our New Years resolutions!

I could do without, but how about you?  Calories are in the eye of the beholder.

You see, we start eating a few more high-density calories and our bodies begin to get used to them.  “I’m being really good during the week, so how could I have gained three pounds since Friday?”  Because, you are eating a bit more on those non-party days but, because of the overload on party days, you think you are barely eating at all on non-party days.  All it takes is a few more mindless bites of this or that and you are on your way to a permanent seven-pound load on January 1.

"Oh what the heck, they love us anyway..."  (UH NO!)

So, rather than throw caution to the wind, how about making the commitment to stop eating party style while not at a party.  It is rather simple to cut your portions down by 20%, and then add 20% more vegetables to your plate or recipe.  Your eyes will see the same amount of food and studies have shown that when trying to lose weight, our bodies are more satisfied with volume, whether it is from lean and healthy veggies or French fries.  (There are about 450 calories in a 5-ounce portion of fries while there are only about 30 calories in a 5-ounce serving of most non-starchy veggies.)  

Fresh fruit smoothie.  Do it!

So, let’s set some ground rules for the holidays, shall we?

Whole wheat veggie and goat cheese pizza.  Yum!

• ·      Load up on the veggies and cut back on the high-density foods like cheese, butter, meat, baked goods and even healthy nuts and nut butters!  
• ·      Get rid of those high-density foods and give your guests “doggie-bags” to take home when you are entertaining.
• ·      For every cocktail consumed at a party commit to drinking a full glass of water.
• ·      Stay away from the appetizer table and sit in a comfy area so you are less apt to get up for MORE.
• ·      Eat a high fiber mini meal before the party (avocado on whole grain bread with tomato and lettuce or beans on a tortilla with salsa and lettuce) so you are satisfied and not STARVED!
• ·      Do not confuse exercise with calories consumed (“since I worked out, I can eat what I want”) but move with a bit more intensity and as often as possible.  Every little bit makes a difference.

Move it girl!  (Oh, and have fun!)

It is always the small and do-able shifts in our lifestyle that makes for a comfortable holiday body.  Bodeci says, “During the holidays, enjoy what you really want in moderation!  Then leave it alone and walk away.” 

11 Days to Fit and Fabulous, Then Life Happened....

I was challenged last week.  I had to depart from my comfort zone, but I asked for it.  I am a firm believer in the 'power of positive thinking' but it still blows me away when my intentions come to pass.  And when my intention came to pass last week, I wasn't sure I could handle it.

Adrienne (The Rich Life on a Budget) called me shortly after I returned home from my adventure, and asked, "I'm just curious, why haven't you posted about it?"   For this conversation and her encouragement, I am dedicating this post to her.  Thank you Adrienne for helping me see straight!

"I wasn't sure if it would be appropriate to discuss, me being a fitness trainer and all.  Wouldn't it confuse people?  And I worry that my students and clients might fear I am quitting the business."

"Debra, when I think of you, I do not think 'Debra the trainer', I think 'Debra is," she paused, searching for a word, "I think you are Bodeci'.  Yes, you train people for a living, but you are much more than that!"

Now, I feel a bit uncomfortable to share this with you, but this is what she said.  "You are an enigma, Debra.  You have a take on life that is refreshing and non-judgmental.  Quite honestly you are the one we all go to when we can't figure out our next step in life, whether it's our kids, a fight we had with our husbands, our career sucks or if we feel fat and unlovable.  I don't think your blog is just about fitness and diet, I think it's about a fifty something year old woman who is wise, comforting and knows how to solve life's problems and who also has her share of insecurities and issues.  I want to hear about all of it!"

I am a mother, a wife,  a friend, a trainer, an instructor and now I am an art dealer of sorts.  A few months ago I decided I wanted more money.  My sons college expenses and the economy had put a pinch in my bank account.  There was only so much Budget my Rich Life could do.  I wanted to live with a bit more wiggle room.  So, I intended more money in my life but I wasn't sure how it was going to get to me.

The power of our thoughts is so  unbelievable, but when you practice the law of attraction and see for yourself the rewards, you may never doubt it's power again.  Rhonda Byrne, author of "The Secret" writes, "...you deserve all good things life has to offer....you are the creator of you, and the law of attraction is your magnificent tool to create whatever you want..."  You see, I didn't just want more money, I wanted to travel and do something exciting.  Kahlil Gibran wrote, "There is a space between man's imagination and man's attainment that may only be traversed by his longing."  I visualized myself traveling, having new clothes and being a part of something really exciting.  Loa Tsu, founder of Toaism wrote, "The world is ruled by letting things take their course.  It cannot be ruled by interfering."  I let go and allowed things to take their course.

My friend of many years owns an art gallery on the east and west coasts.  He is also the exclusive distributor of John Lennon's art working directly with Yoko Ono.  The exhibit is most likely the largest and longest lasting traveling art show.  He was preparing for a show in Boulder Colorado when he suddenly needed another sales person.  I called him that day to thank him for a dinner party he'd invited my husband and me to.  As he talked, he mentioned needing to get to work and I offered him a hand, thinking he'd simply needed a friend to help with his house while he was gone.  He offered me a position.

My new art dealer look.
When you want to become someone different, sometimes you need a costume.
Cary Grant once said, "I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be until I finally became that person."

Now, this is the part I want to share with all of you.  I was scared sh_tless.  I kept asking myself over the course of the next few weeks, why?  Truthfully, I was not so sure I would be "good enough".  But, I realized I had asked the universe for more money, travel and adventure.  And it simply landed in my lap!  I would live with the anxiety and discomfort until I dove in and made my mistakes.  I knew I could learn from them.   I only hoped to not disappoint my friend, but as he put it, "let's just see what happens, I think you'll do well with this."

A week ago I had flown back from Boulder and couldn't sleep as I was flying high off of the show and the fabulous time I had with the people who came to the show and my wonderful associates.  I made mistakes, yes, but I made sales, too.  I just got a nice check in the mail and my friend called with the date and location of my next show.  "And so this is Christmas..."  YES!

Oh, I also lost three of the four pounds I had hanging on me for the last six months.  It wasn't going to budge because I kept telling myself "I have to lose this weight".  You see, the universe only picks up on the energy of my having excess weight and therefore it stayed put!  When I took on a new challenge my mind stopped creating my vision of four pounds too much and the weight  came off.  My body knows it's perfect weight, I just had to let go.  And off to life I went.

23 Giorni per Adattarsi e Favoloso, Diventando Bodeci!

Bodeci is an attitude.  I have heard clients and students of mine refer to a recipe as being "very bodeci". Or a particular restaurant as being "bodeci approved".   "I bodecied the chocolate brownie recipe".  "I just bought a very bodeci outfit."

What isn't Bodeci?

Skinny is no fun

Slutty is overdone

Starving is unhealthy

Ouch!

Chic or stick?

Dieting is a racket!

How can you live more BODECI?

• shift your attitude from need to gratitude
• love with a bit more passion
• lose expectations, gain inspiration
• smile because it gives you an instant face lift
• find your best attributes and show them off tastefully
• laugh because it is sexy
• make a positive difference in your world
• moderately enjoy good food 
• make the healthier choice at least 80% of the time
• be generous with compliments to others and to yourself
• move more than you sit during the day
• make time for prescriptive exercise
• make time for joy
• be creative with food and movement

Live, Eat, Move Bodeci....  Tell me how you live more Bodeci

26 Days to Fit and Fabulous

Begin with your own personal mantra.

Of late, I have found a single sentence of say ten words or less, that conveys a thought of personal inspiration or reward, is really helpful when making lifestyle changes.  A while back, I had a few clients using the phrase, "say no, lose a pound" and another, "how will this make me feel later?".  The simplicity made it easy to remember and helped them to be more mindful during weak moments.

Find a mantra of your own.  Cultivate it first by writing what behavior needs some consciousness.  Then take a moment and feel what you would need to hear just at the moment of caving in to an old behavior you want to change.  Really hear this conversation to the point of understanding its message with a few carefully chosen words.  Write it down a few times and place reminders at various locations where you may need a bit more encouragement.


Organize the most daunting of all your "piles" for fifteen minutes, only.  Just dig in and get as much accomplished as you can then stop after fifteen minutes.

Drink water, drink water, drink water and if this is difficult, try tea. Warm and soothing.  In fact, right this minute drink water.  Then stretch a bit.

Good stretch, just do it.  

Exercise and don't even think about an excuse as you can do five minutes!   In fact, do it, right now.

Calories count so eat a bit less of them.  Eat more vegetables.  Try new ways to pack them in:   stir fry, roasted, pasta and rice dishes.  You will not starve and you will not be deprived.  You can have anything you want, just less of it.  And eat more vegetables, please.

My bean soup made easy:  A few cups of Bodeci Negative Calorie soup, a can of favorite beans, left over chicken or  Negative Calorie meatloaf.  I heat mine in a crock for a few hours on high.  Season to taste and add a slice of avocado. 

Grilled summer veggies.  Now you can slice thin some root vegetables, brush them with olive oil and salt and pepper and bake in the oven for about an hour on 350o.

Imagine all that you are right now.  Notice what is outstanding about you in every way.  Keep this visual in your heart.

I'd be interested in hearing your favorite mantra.